It’s true that high school memories last. For me, the memories of my high school days are still very fresh in my mind — detailed in a sense that I can still remember most events that made me happy, small, sad, cry and laugh.  And it’s a wonderful feeling when you meet someone again from the past, it feels like many things are coming back to you — including some feelings and emotions.

In the early afternoon of November 17, I left a message on Yahoo Messenger to my very old classmate named Lynden Libres. She likes to appear in invisible mode on my list so I usually send messages when I see her name on that status. I was very surprised when she replied with a message telling me that she’s already back in Davao City. Wow, she was gone seven years, and now in sudden she is already back. It was hard for me to believe. Two days after, she visited my house with another classmate which was of course a lot of pleasure on my side and resulted mixed feelings. I could never expect such visit would happen seven years ago, because she disliked me a lot, but some things changed.

Recalling The Past

Lynden Libres was one of the biggest persons of my high school days. When I was freshman, I was immediately attracted to this girl the first time I saw her. We eventually became friends and the friendship story had many upside and downs, especially when many of my classmates learned and reacted from my attraction to her.

When we were third year, she left our class in the middle of school year for a good future in Australia. It was the time when my emotions toward her was intense and her departure made me weep for a couple of days and blank faced for a couple of weeks. I loved her. She did not, however, exhibit any signs of attraction towards me which is rather a painful memory to me.

Compared to other boys, I was different in my high school days — I was non-athletic, and I liked watching animations, making my own stories, and a lot of stuffs many classmates did not understand, except my love for her which I could personally vouch true and moving. She said in the past that she’d like a guy who could outperform her. And that statement remained in my head, became a part of my motivation and contributed somehow to the academic access I experienced in college, where I was hailed a Magna Cum Laude. However, after my graduation, when I told her again that I still have the same feelings, she made a stiff and clear disclosure that I have no chance to her, emotionally-talking. It was again a painful memory that I have learned to accept for many months — which resulted us to become (just) close friends.

Facing The Present

When I encountered Lynden in my place, along with an old high school classmate, I was surprised that physically speaking she didn’t change a lot (except she grew some width on her arm — but mind you, she got a belt in Jujitsu! ). The rest, she’s still the same good, simple girl I used to be deeply in loved with, except she is now ahead among us with her career. She currently works for Ernst and Young, one of the four major accounting firms of the world, in Brisbane, Australia. Now, that’s a big WOW.

When I saw her again, I had mixed feelings of joy and sadness. I was about to cry but I didn’t because I was super happy as well. I just can’t believe that I would be one of the first classmates she’d visit on her return. That means, I’m a lot to her friendship-talking. And that’s good.

She said she would return to Australia on January 10, 2009, and her next visit to the Philippines may take many years after (who knows I might be working or living abroad during those years). Knowing that, I promised to her that I would be present in any gathering she might plan to do including our old classmates in the forthcoming days. We will see. I’m going to live my life to the fullest while she’s still here in the Philippines.

She’s still special to me but she already made a decision, so I respect that and I’m happy that she is going good with life the way she wants it to be. We are already drifting our own different ways of life. In fact, she was the first one I’ve opened up about myself, which I would write in detail hopefully in the future.